she was a very pretty girl and seemed talented and bright and the relationship was deep. i am sure both of them had volatile personality traits. i do empathize with her. i wish she had held out hope or had the emotional support of loved ones to minimize her self harm and not do so much damage to herself
the majority of young people are going through some variation of these issues in my opinion and have attachment problems and so on and so forth. males and females harming each other in friendships and relationships and difficulty coping - stable and attached sense of self with ability to develop approval and sense of safety seems like it’s the exception to the rule
This girl is so disturbed. How can she hold a regular job? I love how they pull out, oh we are all going to kill ourselves!! By using cross sex hormones and surgeries, you are just doing it slower. I'm not sure if it should be banned for adults, but someone like this should not be able to have her breasts removed or take testosterone. There needs to be safeguards to protect people like this from themselves. I have hope that all surgeries and medications will stop for under 18. Under 25 would be better. Thanks Exulansic! All of your work is appreciated!
Good point. Presumably she manages to control her BPD during the daytime at work when teaching. If she is on medication to help her, it's a concern that it isn't working 24/7. Her priority should be getting her meds reassessed and getting stabilised.
The NHS says:
"Over time, many people with borderline personality disorder (BPD) overcome their symptoms and recover."
Her vids don't show someone in a mindset to aim for recovery.
I suppose some of her vids may be exaggerated, and at other times she isn't so bizarre, which would mean she can control it to some degree. But it doesn't look like she wants to control and overcome her BPD at all -- she's using it as a reason for everything in her life. Imagine if she had no BPD, what would she blame all of her behavior on? It's like she herself is never at fault, it's the BPD, it's her former partner, it's Republicans, on and on. Clearly a very disturbed person, I wish she would realize she can be helped, but it would take some serious self-examination, so probably she can't do that. Sad all the way around.
I think on some level she must want change. I think educating people about her condition is a step in the right direction. I know people with BPD that I do trust even though they still have symptoms and struggles. But she is still early in recovery and has a lot of narcissistic traits it seems. I wouldn't trust her to not attribute the existence of her episodes to me if we were to be close or to be able to moderate her behavior if I disappointed her, which I'm gonna eventually do because I'm human. I hope she can keep working towards the kind of stability she needs to have the kind of relationship she wants.
BPD is one of those things where symptoms really come out in the context of significant relationships and so sufferers may be able to manage symptoms in highly structured environments where there are clear rules and expectations. But then they get into a relationship with no rules and to them, murky expectations, and experience episodic periods of intense low mood as a result.
There's no real meds that work. It's just symptoms they try to control. Only intense psychotherapy helps. But it seems to go by the wayside as soon as someone says "no "
This girl needs to placed in a inpatient care facility to get the real help she needs, not affirmation. I can't imagine her being a productive teacher. I would fear, her doing some form of harm during school when things get a little rough or someone doesn't agree with her. To me, she is a powder keg ready to explode. As far as giving children or even adults wrong sex hormones and surgeries to affirm their delusions of being the opposite sex, is the wrong approach. No one is trans, all of these girls are deeply mentally ill. They are all running away from some undiagnosed or under treated mental illness and/or sexual trauma. The psychiatric community has abandoned them for a pay day. No therapist wants take the arduous task to really evaluate why so many girls and women hate themselves so much! It's much easier to write a prescription for one psych med to multiple psych meds, instead of spending days, weeks, months or years getting to the root cause. Many of us feel children should have a chance to grow up, but if we tangle a trans carrot in their face and tell them to wait until they turn 18 or 25, aren't we telling them it's better to destroy your body and mind as an adult. It shouldn't be right for a child and it shouldn't be right for an adult.
It's one thing to present it as a metaphor but to equate it feels very manipulative. I don't know how much pain she's in and she may be in immense pain, but erasing the physicality of pain leads to undertreatment of pain. Women can be in severe pain and seem perfectly calm because they live with it. The metaphor here is to explain why they react as though they're hypersensitive, but that is what she's not getting. She's hypersensitive with a low tolerance, due to fears of what her emotional pain from unexpected emotional transitions means for relationships (abandonment), and that's different from being in a great deal of pain. But it needs to also be acknowledged that some people with BPD also separately have chronic pain syndromes that may be under treated due to perceived hyper sensitivity due to the BPD. It's a real problem that a person with pain or BPD didn't volunteer to have and doesn't want to have.
She would not even be able to speak or do the simple things involved in daily self care if she were in as much pain as those with third degree burns, much less make videos talking about her pain or have completed her college studies or gotten a job. Pain from third degree burns doesn't let up!
"Perhaps this person cannot give informed consent because of her mental condition." Correct.
Mental illness is a terrible affliction and we want to help those who are afflicted. But glorying in your condition and all these self-involved posts seem exhibitionistic and narcissistic in ways not seen in past decades. The culture of victimhood, blaming and over-sharing is deeply troubling. It seems to feed and inflame their illness instead of providing an outlet for self-expression or support.
There is a huge culture that glorifies this and other mental illnesses. It seems like they want enough support get by but nit be better because then the sympathy will dry up. That and a lot are faking for the clout. It's just sad all around
Also, the BPD is BPD-ing, the “I will feel this way in the future, I’m certain of it.” And the absolute mining of circumstances for a reason to feel bed. “I got everything I wanted but others conceivably will not maybe one day possibly so now I’m sad.”
Few things are worse than weaponizing one's mental health issues against the people around them. It contributes to the stigma still associated with mental illness. I don't doubt she suffers from a variety of mh issues but she seems to view it more as a quirk. Not something that needs serious work and care to overcome. It seems so narcissistic that everyone else is to blame but not her. She needs help, but I doubt she'll actually get it
Yes that's the lack of insight. She's happy to have a reason it's not her fault - and it's not, because it's a disability she acquired in childhood or was born with - but she is not quite yet to "but my behavior is still my responsibility to find a way to control, or people can and should distance from me. "
Yeah, she seems way too comfortable to begin that type of healing, especially since it is easier to shirk off the responsibility on to everyone else and make everyone close to her suffer. Hopefully she does get the help that she needs but it's hard to imagine that it will happen
Are young people becoming more mentally and emotionally unstable now? I'd love to see a solid study on this, mental health in young people from say the 1990s to present. It does seem like social media has exacerbated a fairly normal youthful narcissism, or something. Tik Tok, Facebook, Instagram, it's led to an exaggerated emotional content as we see in this woman. I don't know if this is true, or what can be done, but I just wonder how much this insanity is down to social media activity. ???
Well this is the unintended effect of childhood vaccines and modern medicine. Children survive who would have died, and sometimes they're surviving with conditions that make mental illness more likely. I'm in that camp myself and think it's better for mentally and physically disabled people to survive childhood.
Interesting, I hadn't thought of it that way. I too am in the pro-survival camp -- some people who are handicapped physically or mentally are amazing people and the world is a better place for them having survived.
I personally think the worldwide commercialized internet/social media has had a huge impact on humanity in general and the young in particular. We have a tiger by the tail in so many ways with this.
so she blames her ex for her suicide attempt and then blames people in general for her future possible suicide attempt. not identifying as a statistician, but I think I'm beginning to see a pattern here...
I'm watching this again and her comment about breakups being deadly is so messed up. So if you don't want to be with her because of her illness then you're a horrible person but if you get with her you're just stuck unless you want her death on your hands. I doubt she sees it that way, though. I'm pretty sure she's too busy counting trees. How do you convince someone to get help when they think they don't need it
Yea, it's not that the break-up is deadly. It's that she's a threat to herself. She belongs inpatient until she stops threatening to hurt herself, IMO.
On this one I really think you should stay in your lane, tbh
Her lane is the protection of people from surgeons who should be in jail. This is perfectly in her lane.
Someone who is having hallucinations and severe mental health issues cannot possibly give informed consent to cosmetic surgery.
What lane? Sincere question.
Saying "Stay in your lane" is an attempt at censoring the speech of others.
The correct response to someone telling you to "stay in your lane" is to start laughing and then continue on with what you are saying.
I know the general idea of "stay in your lane" but what specific lane is the one that exulansic is supposedly not staying in?
she was a very pretty girl and seemed talented and bright and the relationship was deep. i am sure both of them had volatile personality traits. i do empathize with her. i wish she had held out hope or had the emotional support of loved ones to minimize her self harm and not do so much damage to herself
they could’ve been different culturally and since everyone’s development happens so differently, they could’ve been both stunted in the wrong ways
i fully believe she’s suffering
the majority of young people are going through some variation of these issues in my opinion and have attachment problems and so on and so forth. males and females harming each other in friendships and relationships and difficulty coping - stable and attached sense of self with ability to develop approval and sense of safety seems like it’s the exception to the rule
ik people who exhibit what appears to be narcissistic behaviors but are necessary given the circumstance to protect themselves or who they love
This girl is so disturbed. How can she hold a regular job? I love how they pull out, oh we are all going to kill ourselves!! By using cross sex hormones and surgeries, you are just doing it slower. I'm not sure if it should be banned for adults, but someone like this should not be able to have her breasts removed or take testosterone. There needs to be safeguards to protect people like this from themselves. I have hope that all surgeries and medications will stop for under 18. Under 25 would be better. Thanks Exulansic! All of your work is appreciated!
Good point. Presumably she manages to control her BPD during the daytime at work when teaching. If she is on medication to help her, it's a concern that it isn't working 24/7. Her priority should be getting her meds reassessed and getting stabilised.
The NHS says:
"Over time, many people with borderline personality disorder (BPD) overcome their symptoms and recover."
Her vids don't show someone in a mindset to aim for recovery.
I suppose some of her vids may be exaggerated, and at other times she isn't so bizarre, which would mean she can control it to some degree. But it doesn't look like she wants to control and overcome her BPD at all -- she's using it as a reason for everything in her life. Imagine if she had no BPD, what would she blame all of her behavior on? It's like she herself is never at fault, it's the BPD, it's her former partner, it's Republicans, on and on. Clearly a very disturbed person, I wish she would realize she can be helped, but it would take some serious self-examination, so probably she can't do that. Sad all the way around.
I think on some level she must want change. I think educating people about her condition is a step in the right direction. I know people with BPD that I do trust even though they still have symptoms and struggles. But she is still early in recovery and has a lot of narcissistic traits it seems. I wouldn't trust her to not attribute the existence of her episodes to me if we were to be close or to be able to moderate her behavior if I disappointed her, which I'm gonna eventually do because I'm human. I hope she can keep working towards the kind of stability she needs to have the kind of relationship she wants.
She is also still very young, so has time to change and work on herself. Sometimes I forget how very young these people are!
BPD is one of those things where symptoms really come out in the context of significant relationships and so sufferers may be able to manage symptoms in highly structured environments where there are clear rules and expectations. But then they get into a relationship with no rules and to them, murky expectations, and experience episodic periods of intense low mood as a result.
Excellent point.
There's no real meds that work. It's just symptoms they try to control. Only intense psychotherapy helps. But it seems to go by the wayside as soon as someone says "no "
This girl needs to placed in a inpatient care facility to get the real help she needs, not affirmation. I can't imagine her being a productive teacher. I would fear, her doing some form of harm during school when things get a little rough or someone doesn't agree with her. To me, she is a powder keg ready to explode. As far as giving children or even adults wrong sex hormones and surgeries to affirm their delusions of being the opposite sex, is the wrong approach. No one is trans, all of these girls are deeply mentally ill. They are all running away from some undiagnosed or under treated mental illness and/or sexual trauma. The psychiatric community has abandoned them for a pay day. No therapist wants take the arduous task to really evaluate why so many girls and women hate themselves so much! It's much easier to write a prescription for one psych med to multiple psych meds, instead of spending days, weeks, months or years getting to the root cause. Many of us feel children should have a chance to grow up, but if we tangle a trans carrot in their face and tell them to wait until they turn 18 or 25, aren't we telling them it's better to destroy your body and mind as an adult. It shouldn't be right for a child and it shouldn't be right for an adult.
The 3rd degree burns comparison enrages me. Like please can this community stop co opting the pain and trauma of others.
It's one thing to present it as a metaphor but to equate it feels very manipulative. I don't know how much pain she's in and she may be in immense pain, but erasing the physicality of pain leads to undertreatment of pain. Women can be in severe pain and seem perfectly calm because they live with it. The metaphor here is to explain why they react as though they're hypersensitive, but that is what she's not getting. She's hypersensitive with a low tolerance, due to fears of what her emotional pain from unexpected emotional transitions means for relationships (abandonment), and that's different from being in a great deal of pain. But it needs to also be acknowledged that some people with BPD also separately have chronic pain syndromes that may be under treated due to perceived hyper sensitivity due to the BPD. It's a real problem that a person with pain or BPD didn't volunteer to have and doesn't want to have.
She would not even be able to speak or do the simple things involved in daily self care if she were in as much pain as those with third degree burns, much less make videos talking about her pain or have completed her college studies or gotten a job. Pain from third degree burns doesn't let up!
"Perhaps this person cannot give informed consent because of her mental condition." Correct.
Mental illness is a terrible affliction and we want to help those who are afflicted. But glorying in your condition and all these self-involved posts seem exhibitionistic and narcissistic in ways not seen in past decades. The culture of victimhood, blaming and over-sharing is deeply troubling. It seems to feed and inflame their illness instead of providing an outlet for self-expression or support.
There is a huge culture that glorifies this and other mental illnesses. It seems like they want enough support get by but nit be better because then the sympathy will dry up. That and a lot are faking for the clout. It's just sad all around
I died at the skink image at the end, Ex.
Also, the BPD is BPD-ing, the “I will feel this way in the future, I’m certain of it.” And the absolute mining of circumstances for a reason to feel bed. “I got everything I wanted but others conceivably will not maybe one day possibly so now I’m sad.”
All this money should have been spent on CBT.
This person seems EXTREMELY immature
Personality disorders are a form of developmental delay until they're treated.
Crazy is real y'all.
Few things are worse than weaponizing one's mental health issues against the people around them. It contributes to the stigma still associated with mental illness. I don't doubt she suffers from a variety of mh issues but she seems to view it more as a quirk. Not something that needs serious work and care to overcome. It seems so narcissistic that everyone else is to blame but not her. She needs help, but I doubt she'll actually get it
Yes that's the lack of insight. She's happy to have a reason it's not her fault - and it's not, because it's a disability she acquired in childhood or was born with - but she is not quite yet to "but my behavior is still my responsibility to find a way to control, or people can and should distance from me. "
Yeah, she seems way too comfortable to begin that type of healing, especially since it is easier to shirk off the responsibility on to everyone else and make everyone close to her suffer. Hopefully she does get the help that she needs but it's hard to imagine that it will happen
Unfortunately this is very typical of personality disorders.
Are young people becoming more mentally and emotionally unstable now? I'd love to see a solid study on this, mental health in young people from say the 1990s to present. It does seem like social media has exacerbated a fairly normal youthful narcissism, or something. Tik Tok, Facebook, Instagram, it's led to an exaggerated emotional content as we see in this woman. I don't know if this is true, or what can be done, but I just wonder how much this insanity is down to social media activity. ???
Well this is the unintended effect of childhood vaccines and modern medicine. Children survive who would have died, and sometimes they're surviving with conditions that make mental illness more likely. I'm in that camp myself and think it's better for mentally and physically disabled people to survive childhood.
Interesting, I hadn't thought of it that way. I too am in the pro-survival camp -- some people who are handicapped physically or mentally are amazing people and the world is a better place for them having survived.
I personally think the worldwide commercialized internet/social media has had a huge impact on humanity in general and the young in particular. We have a tiger by the tail in so many ways with this.
so she blames her ex for her suicide attempt and then blames people in general for her future possible suicide attempt. not identifying as a statistician, but I think I'm beginning to see a pattern here...
This girl belongs in a hardware store. Look for her in the nut department. Wing nut.
I'm watching this again and her comment about breakups being deadly is so messed up. So if you don't want to be with her because of her illness then you're a horrible person but if you get with her you're just stuck unless you want her death on your hands. I doubt she sees it that way, though. I'm pretty sure she's too busy counting trees. How do you convince someone to get help when they think they don't need it
Yea, it's not that the break-up is deadly. It's that she's a threat to herself. She belongs inpatient until she stops threatening to hurt herself, IMO.
Victim hood is king nowadays. The more points the bigger the attention. I've seen wayyyyyy too many DID, tourrettes's, etc. fakers to count
Just when I thought you couldn't get any better. My ex had BPD, this video is great 👍
Little Ms. Center of the universe over here ...