146 Comments
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Mary's avatar

Oh Exulansic, where were you when I was in high school being bullied by a group of mean girls? I watched this sitting on the edge of my chair, almost fist pumping the air with each brilliant comeback you made! Do you realize that her maniacal chuckling began to lessen as the questions and answers progressed? And do you think you could help her with that horrific Valley Girl accent? Okaaay!!! Thanks , as always for a wonderful lesson!

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Mary's avatar

And just how many times was she going to tell you and us that she has a Ph.d and teaches at a medical school??? I’m so not impressed.

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Catherine☦️'s avatar

I was born into a family of Ivy League Ph.Ds and physicians.

You know what they told me Ph.D stood for?

"Piled Higher and Deeper"

In other words, "Don't be impressed"

It meant that they read a lot and were good at standardized tests.

People like this woman are silently screaming,

"I HAVE LOW SELF-ESTEEM!"

"NOTICE ME! NOTICE ME!"

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Frances Bucher's avatar

And „Look at what I know“ meaning „I can‘t really think on my own in her case.

I‘m really tired of that barely hidden aggression combined with their „w love &peace“, so ridiculous. Words mean nothing when the body language tells sth completely different. They don‘t get it, are too absorbed by the cultish ideology and too detached from their internal processes. Ridiculous. They might impress confused teens w that but w sane people it won‘t work!

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Diana's avatar

This woman may have narcissistic personality disorder. Here is a link to psychiatrist Dr. Frank Yeomans lecturing about NPD. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hp4AcdnRViI&list=TLPQMzEwMzIwMjPD2QrGUj-1sQ&index=9 NPD is a disorder characterized by a delusion the belief that the person is infallible, superior, entitled to unquestioned acceptance of her beliefs. NOTE: Your questions violated the belief that she must never be questioned. You, therefore, were disrespectful and, as a result, deserved increasingly desperate put downs to avoid endangering her delusion. Otherwise, she would feel utterly despised, rejected, and mistreated. As a result, she started projecting her own feeling of inferiority by treating you with ill disguised contempt, reminding you over and over again of her superior credentials. You are nothing. You don't even know what you're talking about. You deserve to pay $1300 (her daily fee for consultation) in order to submit yourself to her authority and learn what you should know." Dr. Yoemans states that these NPD patients after treating him with constant criticism, dismissal of his skill, complaints about how stupid and ignorant he is, etc. when he asks if they are aware of how they are treating him with contempt, they become outraged. "I'm criticizing YOU? You are the one who is contemptuous and dismissing! " They are not aware of their own contempt--but they project it onto the other person. Project is a psychological term that means they will see mirrored in you what they cannot observe in themselves. They will then feel victimized as they experience their own self hatred through their delusion.

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Susan Siens's avatar

Yes, Diana, you perfectly described my oldest sister.

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Susan Siens's avatar

My best laugh yet today, Catherine! Thank you so much! My nephew is a professor of chemical engineering and he is mightily impressed with himself (no wonder; read Diana's description of NPD and that's his mother I mention in the comment below hers). I find it so sad. When you know bloody everything, you cannot learn anything, and what is life but an endless opportunity for learning?

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Just another voice's avatar

it means they read a lot more on one specific aspect of one narrow subject. This is what horrified me and turned me off getting a Phd. Yes, they gain "expertise" but it is extremely narrow and focused and that very specific view of a single subject makes them dangerously confident but it does not make them an informed source.

Anyone who takes their Phd seriously is not to be trusted and certainly not to be believed.

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Carol Dansereau's avatar

You knocked it out of the park! What a great video that exposes the irrationality, confusion, and hubris of this person who tells us over and over again that she has a medical degree, and she's an expert. You deftly exposed that what she's saying doesn't add up in the slightest. Well done!

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User's avatar
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Apr 1, 2023
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Carol Dansereau's avatar

Thanks for clarifying her actual credentials.

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Frances Bucher's avatar

She seemed to be hiding behind her degree bc she couldn‘t bring in a contentful argument to answer or discuss Ex‘s question. Not only did she expose her lack of ability to discuss a scientific subject, she also showed a very telling body language& tone! One I soon can‘t take anymore....

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North Country's avatar

Her credentialism and the F-word.

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Recynd's avatar

With her vast education about the brain (/s), maybe she can explain why DBS is used to treat dystonia if the only two areas isolated in the brain relate to facial recognition and language, as she contends?

And whatever happened to “there are no stupid questions”? PhD (and teaching) programs really seem to be scraping the bottom of the barrel these days...

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Beeb's avatar

I don’t think it should be considered any kind of “science”. Experiments in psychology aren’t reproducible, and reproducibility is a defining factor of “science”.

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paper clip's avatar

that woman is stoned. i'm serious. i can't watch her.

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Susan Siens's avatar

That was my exact thought: She's on drugs!

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Holly Hart's avatar

I get really tired of someone interjecting "fuck" into everything they say. It does not add anything to rational discussion, which is what Exulansic is trying to engage in. Neither does repeated references to someone's own profession or academic credentials or place of employment.

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Exulansic's avatar

Everything about her screams "I have untreated social pragmatic language disorder and these behaviors are how I compensate for deficits I lack insight into" but even though she's proudly autistic, she got really offended when I said I know how to give that kind of therapy.

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M.'s avatar

"I have untreated social pragmatic language disorder and these behaviors are how I compensate for deficits I lack insight into"

Could you elaborate a bit more on this?

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Exulansic's avatar

She has a variety of strategies to deal with social situations that make her feel insecure or unsafe, such as when she's asked a question she doesn't know the answer to. These include:

> Citing her credentials to intimidate you

>Attempting to placate you by offering to help you with your platform

>Threatening your income/standing in the community

None of these were appropriate responses to my question but they were all learned behaviors that usually work to get people to back off, whether by triggering the questioner's fears or, more likely but she lacks insight into this, triggering the questioner's awareness of her autism and resulting disgust that someone so high functioning could behave so childishly. All of these are avoidance tactics rooted in fear of abandonment and inability to deal with her own emotions and were presumably developed over a lifetime of being autistic and not getting the help she needed earlier in life due to being high functioning.

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Holly Hart's avatar

Any suggestions of books or articles to read to learn more about the behavior of people like her? Most people would not realize she was autistic because she is so socially aggressive. But I understand that the strategies that she uses can be and are used by people who are not autistic. I just want to understand more.

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dorkinlesbian's avatar

i want to understand more too, but more because i think i have social pragmatic deficit, so i'm on a waitlist to get tested for autism

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Catherine☦️'s avatar

May I ask what you hope to gain by having the autism spectrum disorder label?

Will anything meaningful change in your life?

Thanks.

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Recynd's avatar

You could just as likely have ADHD; the two conditions are also linked but not extensively studied.

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Just another voice's avatar

you forgot blankie swaddling.

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GenuinelyAutistic's avatar

I feel like she belongs to the ActuallyAutistic crowd who think any sort of treatment is 'literally conversion therapy'. As someone who actually has autism, this crowd is doing more harm than good.

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paper clip's avatar

an interesting POV i don't hear much from autistic people.

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GenuinelyAutistic's avatar

The self diagnosed 'ActuallyAutistics' like to talk for autistic people, even though it is not even certain whether they have the condition or not. Because these people are very high functioning, they are against any type of therapy, making it hard for people who are less functioning to get the right accomedations.

Example: Here in my country (Denmark), there is a special necklace you can get if you have special needs. However, that necklace is based on self identity, rather than official diagnosis, so everyone can go get one on the nearest pharmacy or even grocery. Last week, there was a problem with people using the necklace to get accomedations they didn't really need (for example, a friend group passed around a necklace to skip line), while an autistic child had to wait longer and be among a huge crowd for a longer amount of time. Self diagnosis is dangerous because people can and will abuse the accomedations.

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Frances Bucher's avatar

I assume people who are proud of a disorder don‘t like to get treatment, they want to be affirmed;) Her loving inclusive community probably reacts like:“ Yeah cool, welcome to the club, you‘re so great, so intelligent, we are so special and so are you!“(We don‘t need treatment, we don‘t want to loose the „special status“)

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GenuinelyAutistic's avatar

Yeah, exactly. For me it feels so pointless to be proud of having autism. It's a mental disorder, not a personal achievement

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Rain's avatar

They can fix autism with talk therapy?

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M.'s avatar

What an absolutely unpleasant person. The sheer condescension oozing from her is completely insufferable.

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Catherine☦️'s avatar

I had a professor like this at UCLA. She was a bully with an MA in psychology, and she really knew how to work a crowd. We all hated her. We endured her course because we had to.

One day she whipped the class into a frenzy as I was in front of the class taking part in a demonstration of Group Therapy techniques.

She manipulated my classmates into verbally attacking me at the very moment I had made myself vulnerable during the exercise. In that moment, I saw how normally good and kind people can be turned into a violent mob.

The following week, one by one, my classmates sought me out to apologize for their behavior that night. They seemed stunned, and as traumatized as I was by the whole episode. The Christian minister seemed particularly shocked and ashamed of himself.

That was one of the most impactful learning moments of my life.

I can now spot this personality type immediately. People like this can become cult leaders. They are dangerous. I'm not surprised she sought out a position of authority over people who must endure her presence, and pretend to agree with her.

What a piece of shit she is for threatening you professionally. Every area in medicine is understaffed right now. All the recruiters who contact me are offering a 10-20K sign-on bonus if I'll promise to stick around for a year or two.

She isn't special. She's a nasty, angry, ugly person who enjoys inflicting harm.

You handled her brilliantly.

Well done.

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Susan Siens's avatar

Excellent comment. And I'm sure you spent a lot of time thinking about how and why people fall such easy prey to monsters. I'm still trying to understand what people SEE when they look at someone who looks like a Halloween mask -- say, Johnny Depp -- and still hero-worship him. I get that "celebrity is the worship of the talentless by the mindless," but we're supposed to have an automatic revulsion looking at monstrous people or people behaving monstrously.

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Erin King's avatar

Yes, but that can be conditioned away or at least dulled dramatically through repetitive exposure. Which is kind of what "inclusivity" is, in a broad way. Certainly now. You can see that in attempts to rebrand pedophiles into "minor attracted people". For the record, I think learning about and interacting with a wide variety of people is a net benefit and does make people more truly tolerant in a "I may not get you, but I won't harm you" kind of way. Some things should not be accepted or tolerated, though, and harm to children should be one of those things.

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Susan Siens's avatar

I've never been a person living in an ivory tower. My jobs were always working-class jobs, I've been exposed to a wide variety of people, and I find tolerance patronizing (sorry!). But unless you were exposed to repulsive behavior as a child and didn't develop that gut instinct, that deep-down sense that something is wrong, I don't think you can condition away revulsion. It's a fundamental sense that children possess; a personal example for me is a family friend who I always wanted to hide from. He never did anything to me and my parents tried to overlook my reaction, but my mother years LATER told me she thought he beat his wife (who I liked very much).

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Pamela Armstrong's avatar

Thank you Exulsanic. Your responses are pure genius. Brick by brick you totally destroyed that wall.

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Gayle R's avatar

Why in hell is nose ring wrapped in blankets? Some kind of coping mechanism from which to spout bullshit? Okaaay?!

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Exulansic's avatar

Game idea every time she says okay you have to make 👌 with your hand

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Mary's avatar

Yes, the pink blanket wrapped in her hands and partially covering her face reminded me of a child in the middle of a temper tantrum!

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Frances Bucher's avatar

I think I just discovered an area in my brain that causes an allergic reaction to this kind of people who say „with love and peace“ but mean „you‘re so stupid, you don‘t get it, I, ME, SEE ME?? I AM THE PERSON OF KNOWLEDGE here and I don‘t accept any new input to think about. I don‘t like what you say, so it can‘t be true!“

Her face expressions reveal her whole attitude. Had to listen to her without watching her after she had distracted me several times too much with her mimics and annoying tone...Seems like she can‘t deal with rationally arguing persons.

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James McKay's avatar

that is not a nice person

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Mary's avatar

That’s an understatement!

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Mildred's avatar

Is that person still in junior high school, what's with the little kid voice? What's she doing filming herself in bed under the covers? Why is she yelling at Exulansic? Oh what a horrible, awful, stupid person. She ought to be embarrassed. What a disaster of a human being. Once again Ex is too kind to these goons.

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Joan's avatar

Well, the truth is that there are those who are simply bad at what they do, in spite (or because) of what and how they carry the placed task, ----- exemplar?

I do so think-----

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Joan's avatar

Moreover, would one ever choose to request her service? She doth mess her own dwelling-----

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James Mackenzie's avatar

The affect of this person is so deeply off putting. I have met several medical “professionals” with a similar affect and I immediately distrust them.

“I have a PhD, I am a professor at a medical school” she says slandering people from under bedding…

“Listen, I am a nice person” unless that’s a tong in cheek comment… people who say such things are normally not very nice people.

Sorry for getting personal…

Thanks for Exu

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Zelda Webb's avatar

She keeps saying “right?” in a valley girl accent complete with vocal fry which is one of the most absolutely transparent vocal tic tells indicating that she knows she doesn’t know what she’s talking about. Lol.

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Samantha Lee's avatar

Meghan Markle, also a raging narcissist, does that, “right?” at the end of every lie she tells.

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Zelda Webb's avatar

Always. I also hear it a ton on NPR (which I only occasionally hate-listen to nowadays, but yeah).

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Mary's avatar

Isn’t that part of the “valley girl “ thing? Okaaaaay!

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Louise R's avatar

With, like, the rising inflection at the end of every statement, right?

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